Excitment...

SO EXCITED!! So I applied to be the fundraiser chair for Circle K a group that I am in here on campus...well needless to say I didn't think I was going to get it but I did!!! I am so freakin excited. I love doing this kind of stuff. It makes my day. Otherwise life is good. I think. Kind of sad. School is almost over. I can't believe I am going to be done with my freshman year of college.

This weekend was interesting. Friday I went out with Toni. HA!! lets just say we met some very interesting people. I had fun. Saturday was a bad day. I donated 14 inces of my hair!!! that was good...but after that it went downhill. The great click from high school decided to start more shit about me. I dont get it. It has almost been a year since I have seen these people but they still love to talk about me. I just don't know what to do anymore. I know I should not let it get to me but I am just sick of it. I want them to leave me alone. All well i have to get over it. I stayed in saturday night. I just wanted to be by myself. Sunday was a lazy day like always. Meghan and I dominated the puzzle we have been working on. That is the 4th puzzle this year. We are amazing. I am going to miss living with these girls. I love them.

Maybe my next blog will be looking back at the year...who knows.
Josh and I well who knows right now. I take it day by day. I like him alot and I am going to miss him over the summer. I just wish something would happen but I don't think it will.

I am off to watch V mars!!!!

lovelove

You raise me up

this week is almost over and I can't believe it. It's crazy. I have had a good week so far besides this morning. My weekend was interesting. I got a lot of work done and well had some fun. Friday we played games and just chilled. Saturday we went and saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall, I highly recommend this movie. It was Jenny, Mitch, Meghan, Josh, Ryan, Kelly and I. Yes kelly came and I was not to happy about that. Josh didnt even talk to me it made me sad. Then Travis this guy I think is cute walked into the movie theater with his girlfriend and I freaked out. That night we played some interesting games that I had neve played before. Then I hung out in Josh's room for the night. haha thats all that needs to be said about that. I did accuse him of not liking me anymore and he says he still likes me so who knows. I was on a rampage that night and said some mean things I really regret most of it. All well he knows where I stand now. This week..hm not much has happened. Classes are boring like always. I had a presentation on tuesday that went well and I have one tomorrow that will go just fine. My grade in chem went up to a B so i was super excited. I also got a 94 on one of my test that was exciting. Um otherwise this morning sucked. The weather has been super nice and I LOVE it. Saturday I cut my hair I am kinda nervous but super excited.

Slowly letting go

It has been a crazy hectic week. I had four papers and two presentations this week and i am drained. This weekend well its not a weekend for me. I have so much homework it's not even funny. Let me think of what has happened in this time period. Josh was suppose to hang out with me last saturday but he got really drunk and didn't come I was kinda sad. Sunday dont remember much of that day I think I went grocery shopping..haha. Monday started the hectic week. Tuesday I went to a Sex Fair and that was interesting. In between this crazy academic week I had to deal with friend and emotional problems. One of my best friends decided to tell me stuff that hurt me. I had no idea she had been doing some of the things she has been doing. I was in shock. I cried and had no idea what to do. I still cry thinking about it...I mean it's her life but I am hurt that she didn't tell me. I wish she would have. Wednesday I went to a book club thing for 4 hours..that killed me. I have become really good friends with the library this week. I just don't think I can sit in my room and do anything productive. It just was a crazy week. UGH!!! I thought with the end of the year approaching my load would get easier and I def was wrong on that. I am so glad I have friends here that I can vent too cuz I would probably end up freaking out if I didnt have them. There are some new guys on my radar and I am hoping I can make things happen..haha. Who knows. Well I am off to do some homework and who knows what else..probably sleep my body cant take much more of this.

tiredbutlovelove

Its just to late

tears
they fall everyday lately
they swell up in my eyes
I hold them back
hoping
wishing things will get better
but i know
its time to let go
time to move on
time to take things back into my hands
I hope you realize
that you lost a freindship
one that can not be replaced...
alone
tears
sobs
what have you done?
what have I done?
non stop
flowing
crying
tons
thousands
hundreds
ten...
five...
one
tear
one solo tear
one person left alone....again
one heart
one friend
one giant tear
thats all that is left

I have been there done that fucked around

School is almost over! I cant believe it. This year has went by so fast. My first day here feels like it was yesterday. I remember moving in and meeting my roommate for the first time. All of us were a little sketchy of each other. I had no idea what to think of anyone. I had no idea what was going to happen in the next couple of months. I am not going to lie I was not to sure of the people who I became friends with right away. I was a little worried that once we got to all know each other we would hate each other. I am more of a "preppy, happy" person then others. I didn't know if this type of personality would be accepted. I came to the point where I didn't care and I have made great friends so far. I love them all! I just cant believe are time together here in the dorm is coming to an end in little more then a month. its crazy.

This week has been crazy. Academic wise nothing to big happened haha never does. Otherwise Adam didnt get a seat on the City Council and I feel really bad for him. I know he wanted it really bad but it just was not his turn. It was not meant to be. Teenie didn't come visit me and that made me sad. I was looking forward to seeing her. Other tid bite happened but nothing big. Kristi and I started talking again and well I hope things work themselves out between us...I miss the friendship.

Lovelove

ps I might be cutting off all of my hair to donate!!!!! I am nervous....